Lost but Found
by ForgetAboutTheory
Summary: After Aria loses someone close to her, she changes the way her life is going. She is forced to learn to open up again when she meets Ezra Fitz. But can she devote herself to someone after her tragic past?
1. Chapter 1

Aria sighed deeply as her head hit the pillow and her body lay uncomfortably on the cheap mattress. She look around the rental apartment she shared with Jason. In the centre of Philadelphia and with there price range, this was the best they were going to get. It was pretty dark and had a weird smell when you walked in but once you got over that, I guess it could be average.

Aria, since her pre school days had dreamed of her adult home. She has spent hours relentlessly rearranging her dolls house situated in her mother's studio, much to Ella's discontent. Aria spent every free moment she had there, never playing with the dolls but always making sure the interior decoration was adjusted until she reach perfection. Since then Ella had tried to push Aria to put her skill and passion to use and go down the career path of interior decoration but things got in the way. Life got in the way.

Aria had attempted to improve the allure of the small apartment by decorating it with various photos of the pair and the memories they had created. Aria glanced over to the photo on the bed side table, it was a photo of her and Jason at her graduation, just before the news came in. Aria could remember the day so clearly.

* * *

_'Aria, chin up!' Spencer dictated._

_She was hunched over her Canon camera trying to get the perfect shot of her half-brother and her best friend. Spencer was far from happy about their dating situation, however, the past six months had proved to her that there was no one else for either of them. _

_The camera clicked loudly and Spencer straitened up to her normal dancer's posture. Jason turned towards Aria. _

_'I'm proud of you munchkin.' Aria grimaced. _

_'Don't call me that.' Jason laughed and wrapped his hand around hers. His cellphone vibrated signalling a call coming in. Jason pulled the phone out of his trouser pocket and an expression of fear fell across his face for a split second and was quickly masked by a smile. _

_'I got to get this, I'll meet you inside, save me a seat!' he called whilst walking away to take the call. _

_LB _

_Aria and Spencer had waited for Jason but he never did occupy the saved seat, there was a nagging worry in Aria's mind throughout the meal about Jason. Never would he desert her like this. _

_After the meal Aria grabbed her beaded clutch and headed for the court yard behind the manor house at which the graduation dinner was held. _

_The pathway was lit with exterior lighting making Aria feel she was entering a fairy grotto, similar to the ones she had imagined in her head as a child. She saw him sitting alone on a stone bench in the centre of the courtyard. He had his head in his hands and he was clutching his hair as though his life depended upon it. _

_Aria quickly walked over and placed her hand on his back in a comforting manner, he flinched at the sudden contact but his eyes soften when he saw it was Aria. _

_'Where were you? We missed you at dinner.'_

_Jason grabbed both her hands and pulled her down to sit beside him her long silky dress skimmed the floor. It was then that Aria noticed the tears glistening in Jason's eyes. _

_'Jason?' Aria said, her voice laced with worry. _

_He placed his hand on her thigh and continued to hold her other hand, caressing it with his thumb. _

_'That was the sergeant. There has been a vacancy for a new job that I am required to fill.'_

_Aria's stomach lurched, she knew what this would mean for them. For him. Tears filled her eyes and she grabbed his hand even tighter, her nails digging into his palm, hoping the clutch of her nails would stop him from leaving._

_'I've been asked to fight in Afghanistan.' _

_Hearing those seven words was something Aria hoped she would never have to face. The reality of him saying them crashed around her and her breathing began to falter. Not her Jason, they couldn't take him. _

_Jason pulled her into his chest as she began to sob, her silver eye shadow making a mark on his bleach white shirt. He caressed her back as an attempt to soothe her. Shield her from the horrible truth they were both facing. _

_Aria sat up and looked him straight in the eye, her eye make up smudged on her face and on his shirt. _

_'Can you say no?' she asked, hoping the answer would have changed. _

_'Aria. You know I can't. It what I signed up for when I enlisted.'_

_Tears filled her eyes again as she leaned back into his chest, breathing in his scent._

* * *

She turned back over to again face the ceiling and sighed. She wondered how different things would be if she would've followed her passion of interior design. One thing was for sure, she wouldn't wind up in a dead-end secretarial position in a multi-national company.

She clicked her knuckles and reached across the bed to grab her most recent read. The apartment may have been modest but Aria's book collection was not. She had everything from Ulysses to Harry Potter. From Matilda to 1984. Her current read was The Catcher in the Rye. A favourite of hers she had read many times before but she saw no harm in re-reading a timeless classic.

After half an hour of reading, Aria began to feel her eyes droop and sleep began to pull her in. She leaned across to switch of the light not realising these would be the final carefree moments she would feel for a long time.

* * *

Aria was jolted out of her deep slumber suddenly by a slender pair of hands shaking her shoulders. Aria's eyes opened slowly, adjusting to the dim lighting of the sombre apartment, she turned to face the clock.

_3.23_

She turned back to see Spencer. Her eyes were red and her shaking hands were still clasped to her shoulders. In the distance, she could see two blurred people. A man and a woman. One she knew to be a mother, a silhouette she had learnt since the decline of her eyesight, she leaned over and picked up her glasses and forced them onto her head.

The man was revealed to be Spencer's father, Peter Hastings. A wealthy lawyer with a thick skin and a firm opinion. She has never seen any sign of weakness in him, any sign of fear but she saw a change tonight. A change in the way she stood, the way his face looked. Tired. Scared.

She looked to her mother for an explanation. As their eyes met, her mother's were filled with sympathy and sorrow. Aria's breath quickened. What was happening?

Her mother stepped forwards to the bed and removed Spencer's arms from Aria's shoulders. It was at this point that Spencer became hysterical and ran to her father for even a minuscule amount of comfort, something he could not give, yet he tried anyway as he cradled her. He guided her to the living room and sat on the couch with her, still cradling her in his arms as though she was a child once more.

Ella breathed deeply as she looked back to Aria. Aria's eyes searched hers in desperation of an answer of what was going on.

Her stomach was lurching and thoughts were spinning around her head as she prayed the answer wasn't the scenario she was dreading the most.

Her mother placed her hand on top of Aria's.

'Mom?' Aria's breath faltered as she said it and the small damp room began to close in around her making her feel claustrophobic, her head felt light and her breathing shallowed.

'There has been an accident.'

Aria's stomach dropped as she suddenly felt the discomfort of her disgustingly uncomfortable mattress more than ever.

'U.S veterans have been held at gunpoint for information. Their pledge of allegiance means they can't give up information.'

'I know Mom.' Aria was shaking now, tears filling her eyes causing the whole room to turn into a blurry mess, pretty similar to what her life was slowly becoming.

Ella didn't know the best way to tell her daughter her long term boyfriend was dead. She assumed Aria had guessed at it from her current reaction.

'Jason has been found with two other veterans. They all kept their promise to the army, no one gave in. Aria I'm so sorry.'

Aria tried to scream but no words came out. Her lungs tightened and her throat dried. She kicked her feet as though she was once again that four year old in her mother's studio. Who would have thought that little innocent child would grow up to face to much.

'You're 19, I know you don't deserve this. He didn't either.' Tears were streaming freely down Ella's face now as she watched her 19 year old daughter struggle with the fact that the love of her life was gone.

Aria sat up, her eyes wide as though she was in a trance. She brought both of her knees up and hugged them staring forward at the printed canvas of them on the wall. It showed two smiling people, so different from how things were now. It was take on their holiday to China only 7 months before.

Aria smelt the t-shirt she was wearing. His t-shirt. The last time she would smell him. He was gone. Never coming back.

Her eyes filled once again with tears and her body suddenly lost all control, she fell back and her head hit the pillow for the second time that night. Only this time she didn't breathe a sigh of relief, she screamed out in pain. The pain that her love was being ripped away from her in a cruel twist of fate.

She thought of how cruel fate had been to her, allowing her to fall in love only to take it away less than 3 years later.

At that moment Aria made a decision. Fate wasn't going to control her life any more. She was.

Because it seemed to her that life is a bitch and she was going to have to learn how to get the upper hand if she wanted to have control.

It was then she decided that fate was nothing more than an excuse for the bad and good. Fate wasn't real but she was and she sure as hell was never accepting the shitty hand she'd been dealt again. Life was one game she was not going to lose.

**A/N Hey guys!**

**So I promise this is an Ezria fanfic but this chapter is kind of serving as a prologue.**

**Let me know what you think! I really hope you enjoyed and please let me know what you thought as I'm really unsure as to whether to continue this one! **

**Please excuse my army terminology as I'm so ignorant when it come to that stuff so I wrote and hoped for the best! **

**What Feels Right _should _be updated next weekend but I've got a lot of school work at the moment so we'll have to see but I do have part of the next chapter already written.**

**I hope you guys are starting to wind down for Christmas and are having a great wintery time! !**

**Please review, it means so much you have no idea! **

**Lots of love!**


	2. Chapter 2

**6 Months Later **

Aria woke up to a glaring light peeking through the blinds and shining straight into her hazel eyes. She winced, pulling the covers over her head in order to shield herself from the light of the morning. Aria had always been the type of person to spend half of her day in bed doing pretty much nothing at all just for the sake of not getting out of bed, she could remember her mother's frustration , when she would walk into the unlit room at 2pm and attempt to lure a teenage Aria out of bed with a lunch of some kind. Nowadays Aria had to get up, hanging around the apartment for too long seemed to morbid.

After a few moments under the sheets, Aria braved the bright room again and dragged herself over to the kitchen unit to make herself a coffee. She reached up to grab the Splenda in the cupboard, Jason would often put it on the highest shelf simply to see Aria struggle as she tried to reach it each morning, eventually he would come up behind her and grab the small box for her, pulling her into a kiss after he had placed the box on the counter. Aria couldn't quite face moving the box from it's place in the cupboard, desperately hoping each time she reached up, she would feel his strong arms around her waist and being desperately disappointed each time the reality of the situation came crashing down with the Splenda box she had managed to knock off the top shelf.

Her next task was getting her Keurig to work. Usually it did, but at times it was temperamental and Aria had to resort to going to the local Starbucks to buy her morning coffee, although she hated to spend money on things that weren't necessary if only she had a fully functioning coffee maker. She grabbed her plastic jug and ambled over to the sink to fill it with water, as she reached over to turn on the sink, freezing cold water splashed over her, drenching her pyjamas and her hair. Aria sighed as she inspected the leaky tap, realising there was a problem with the pipe causing the water to expel for the tap earlier than it should. Aria's plumbing skills went about as far as that so she grabbed her phone and called the plumber she had called a couple months before when she was experiencing problems with her shower.

The tone rung for approximately 20 seconds before the same friendly man Aria remembered picked up the phone.

"_Aquatec, how can I help you?"_

"_Hi, yeah. I'm having a problem with my sink, there's water going everywhere when I turn it on. I wondered if there was someone who could get out today to come and fix it?" _

"_Um, let me just check the book, yeah I can be there at 9? Otherwise you'll be waiting until tomorrow I'm afraid." _

"_No, nine is great thank you so much." _

Aria then recited her address to the man on the phone and the man confirmed that he would try to be there by nine if he could avoid the morning traffic. Nine'o'clock was in twenty five minutes meaning Aria would have to quickly pull on a new outfit since the one she currently sported was see-through.

* * *

By nine she had managed to shower and dress in order to look presentable for the complete stranger she was welcoming into her home. She was wearing simple black jeans with an over sized t-shirt of Jason's that had been passed down to Aria after shrinking in the wash. Whenever Aria wore it, she felt a sense of closeness to Jason, almost as if he was there. Over the past six months, Aria had felt this way often, she would be doing the most ordinary everyday errands and suddenly feel as though Jason was with her, she couldn't explain it, she simply felt less lonely than usual. The worst time had been her twentieth birthday, it had been hard having her first birthday without him, trying to celebrate but knowing she couldn't really be happy.

October was looming over her now and by this time Jason would've been home and they would have been taking romantic walks through Central Park through the auburn leaves that coated the floor, instead, Aria found herself rushing through the leaves in order to catch the subway to work each morning.

Since Jason, Aria had managed to get herself an intern-ship at an Interior Design firm on the Upper East Side. Although paid very little by the company, Aria was glad to be getting paid at all whilst gaining the experience in the career area she hoped to explore further.

She spent most of her days helping to map out the living rooms and kitchens for the wealth of the city and occasionally she would leave the office to tour an apartment in order to spark her inspiration for how she wanted to plan a certain room.

She had been working at the firm for over 4 months now and was beginning to be rewarded with tasks less trivial than copying up clients' files. Her boss, Jenny, could see her clear passion for design and was beginning to give her more challenging tasks which Aria was flattered by, considering the company seemed to be impressed with how she was handling the clients and the final designs she was coming up with.

Her thoughts were interrupted by a loud knock on the door causing her to start she paced over to the door and opened it to reveal an average sized man with short brown/blonde hair.

"Hi, I'm Hardy." he smiled. Aria returned a smile and stepped aside in order to let Hardy into the small apartment.

"Nice place you've got here." Hardy said, attempting to make conversation and fill the awkward silence.

Since Jason's death, Aria had found it hard to open up and talk to people she didn't know, she hadn't found it hard at all before, as a child she had always been very animated and was encouraged by her parents to be as friendly as she could. At all of her father's work mixers, held at the Montgomery home, Aria would pass around the food in a formal dress and patent shoes and make everyone at the party coo over her cuteness as she attempted to waitress. Yet since Jason, she had somehow become more introverted.

"Not really." Aria chuckled, "Me and.." she hesitated, she never quite knew what to refer to Jason as.

"I bought the apartment with my boyfriend at the time." she revised, "Unfortunately it's just me now and without him the place seems to be falling apart."

"I'm sorry to hear that. He must be insane, no one with any sense would end things with you." he said offering her another smile. Aria sighed.

"He didn't end things on purpose. Unfortunately, her passed away in April."

Hardy looked aghast. Internally he kicked himself for trying to flirt with a girl who six months ago had lost her boyfriend. Nice one.

"Don't look like that!" Aria reassured him. "How were you to know?"

"I'm so sorry for your loss."

Aria never really knew what to say when people said this. She must have heard it over a hundred times since April and no matter how many people said it to her, she couldn't seem to come up with a suitable response.

'Yeah, it's been hard.'

Suddenly Aria felt herself opening up to this guy more than she'd opened up to anyone in months, even her closest friends and family. She explained to him how hard it had been since her friends and family live in Rosewood near Philadelphia and it was hard to get back and see them as often as she would like which makes the situation more difficult as she desperately needs the support of friends and family during this time. However, she elucidated that her best friend Spencer lived on 82nd Street on the Upper East Side, so it made things a little easier.

Aria was always happy to have Spencer living closer than the rest of her friends. Although she loved each of them for their different traits and qualities, Spencer always seemed to be the most helpful in any situation. Spencer had been like a sister to Aria throughout everything they had been through and if anything, losing Jason had brought them closer.

She often visited her and Wren in their luxury apartment, with Wren's well paying medical job and Spencer's family money, they were never going to be living anywhere other than between 59th and 96th Street. Spencer had found work in the law profession and was beginning to become extremely successful, after all, her parents were two of the best lawyers on the east coast. Spencer's life was almost like a scene out of Gossip Girl nowadays and Aria loved to be part of that, even just for two hours or so a week after work.

Hardy was listening to Aria with genuine interest in what she was saying. Aria had missed having someone who would actually care about what she had to say and what she felt. For the past six months, Aria had only been able to speak about Jason when talking about her feelings, it simply seemed like the proper thing to do but suddenly speaking about how she felt in regards to everything going on in her life (other than Jason) was like a giant weight was being lifted off of her chest.

* * *

Hardy took twenty minutes to fix the broken pipe, apparently it was a very simple problem which had a name Aria couldn't remember nor wanted to. He was busy putting his tools back into the box he had brought with him when Aria made a decision she had been debating over the past half an hour.

"Do you want to grab a drink tonight?" Aria suggested.

Hardy hesitated and Aria continued.

"Obviously it wouldn't mean anything. Just an idea. I didn't want to pressurise you but I just thought. I don't know." Her ramble stopped as Aria thoughts seemed to catch up with her.

"I would love to grab a drink, as long as you're sure?" Hardy smiled reassuringly, 'I know this great wine bar near Central Park, it's called The Petrie Court."

Aria smiled. She had spent many an evening on their rooftop lounge with Spencer.

"I know it. Sound's great. I'll see you there at seven?"

Hardy nodded.

"I'll be the guy at the bar staring at my iPhone." Hardy laughed.

Aria joined in, but only out of politeness, she preferred men who weren't so obsessed with the virtual world everybody else seemed to live in.

Hardy pulled out his iPhone and coughed, causing Aria to look up into his eyes.

"I really should go, I've got another job at ten."

Aria nodded and smiled, showing him out whilst thanking him for fixing the tap and confirming the arrangements for that evening.

* * *

The day passed reasonably quickly and soon enough Aria was making her way to The Petrie Court wearing a black simple dress and black wedges. Aria found herself pretty much walking everywhere since a car in the city was impractical due to the busyness of the streets at any hour of the day. She sometimes used public transport but even that was rare, she lived in a central part of the city, that made walking anywhere pretty quick and Aria was a lover of the scenery, so walking was never a chore for her.

The walk to the bar was around ten minutes from the apartment, she knew she was going to be early since she had left at 6.25 though she had brought a book to read as she waited for Hardy.

She arrived at the bar at around 6.40 and ordered a Pinot Grigio. After she received her drink, she opened her book and began to get lost in Austen.

"You alright down there?" The voice caused Aria to lift her head from her book and follow the direction from which the sound was coming from.

It came from a man, about twenty-six with curly black hair. He was wearing a business suit and holding a book in his hands.

_Ulysses._

Aria smiled and looked back up to the man's blue/grey eyes.

"Yeah, I guess. It's my first time in this kinda place for a while so I guess I need to get used to it again. I probably shouldn't be sat here reading, it's kinda lame." she blushed.

"Let's be lame together." he said chuckling and holding up the book.

"Oh. I'm sorry. I didn't mean." Aria stuttered.

The man moved up to close the two seat gap between them.

"I'll let you in on a secret." he said as he moved.

He placed himself on the seat to the right of Aria and leant closer to her. Aria felt a tingle down her spine as she felt his breath on her neck.

"I take a book to every bar I go to. Lame right?" he whispered in her ear.

Aria let out a breath she had been holding in anticipation of what he would say and laughed.

"You're not lame, I'm a total book nerd too." Aria reassured him.

He raised his eyebrows as if in doubt.

"I took a book to the mall when I was 12. Every time." Aria said laughing.

He chuckled. He wanted to hear her laugh again, it was beautiful.

"Ok you win." he said. "I'm Ezra."

"Ezra. It suits you." Aria replied. "I'm Aria."

"Beautiful." Ezra mumbled under his breath.

"Pardon?" Aria said.

"It suits you." he said. Aria blushed.

"Ezra buddy! What are you doing here?!" Both heads whipped around upon hearing the voice behind them.

"Hardy! Hi." Ezra said shuffling in his seat.

"I see you met my date this evening." Hardy said kissing Aria on the cheek.

Not unnoticed by Aria, Ezra's demeanour dropped but was quickly recovered with a smile.

"We met this morning." Aria quickly explained. "Hardy was my plumber."

Ezra nodded, biting on his bottom lip.

"Perks of the job I guess. What're you doing here anyway man?" Hardy asked.

"Oh just, you know..." Ezra trailed off.

"Reading. Seriously?" He turned to Aria to share in the joke, upon turning he glanced down and saw the book on the bar in front of her, his eyes widened. "Oh." he added quietly.

Aria bent her head down praying she could just disappear. She stole a glance towards Ezra and blushed when she turned to meet his eyes gazing towards her.

"Aria." Hardy interrupted yet another moment between the pair. "Shall we go get a seat?"

Disappointment swelled inside her, she was almost hoping Hardy would leave.

"Sure, I'll get the first round, you go grab us a seat."

"Aria, I'm not going to make you pay for you-"

"Hardy." Aria interrupted, "I'm kind of a feminist, I'll buy the drinks, you know defy the stereotype."

Hardy laughed and nodded.

"Ok I'll meet you at the table. Good seeing you Ezra, give me a text sometime."

Ezra nodded, falsely smiling at Hardy.

As he walked away Aria turned to order.

"He's a jerk." Ezra said suddenly.

"Excuse me?" Aria said.

Ezra thought for a second. She was amazing. The female version of him, he couldn't let her choose Hardy, the dick he had to endure through college.

"He was still going to make you pay for your drinks. I think you went on a date with the wrong guy tonight Aria."

Aria's eyebrows raised as she evaluated what he said. Finally she gave in.

"Me too." she agreed.

Ezra's eyes widened, his heart beat quickened and a smile crept across his face.

"You want to get out of here?"

Aria glanced over to the table Hardy had chosen. He was engrossed with his iPhone, it looked like he was playing a trivial game.

Aria turned back to Ezra and smiled,

"I guess I'm going to have to find a new plumber." she said grabbing Ezra's hand, pulling him off of the bar stool and out of The Petrie Court.

**A/N Ok so I'm so sorry for the lack of updates, I basically have no excuse except for loss of enthusiasm and partly school. **

**I tried to make this one a little longer than usual to make up for it. **

**Thank you to Jenny for allowing me to use your name (once in this chapter and more in the future.) You will be a star I'm sure.**

**Thank you to Kate for being so excited about the prospect of me updating and your help on my spelling.**

**I tried to proof this but to be honest I just wanted to get it up tonight so there may have been a couple mistakes so sorry for that! **

**I can't promise I will have an update up next week because I said that last time but I am going to try really hard to write next weekend because I should have a lot of free time on Sunday.**

**Please review, it makes me want to write. **


End file.
